THE MARRIAGE BUILDER - Commitment

The second building block in the foundation of oneness is COMMITMENT. Last week we studied how God's grace is sufficient reason for continued obedience (Building Block 1). This week we studied how honoring your marriage vows consistently is possible because of a conviction that God's plan is always good (Building Block 2).

COMMITMENT must be motivated by DESIRE. There is a difference between making a "decision" to do something and having a "desire" to do something. Our "desire" to honor the marriage vow consistently, even to a difficult spouse, must be motivated from God's Goodness rather than from our obedience. Dr. Crabb teaches that there are three concepts to help you "desire" to fulfill your marriage COMMITMENT:

• POINT 1: The basis for true commitment is the goodness of God (see slide 35 in the lesson).
• POINT 2: Honoring commitments because of a profound trust in God's goodness will feel less like "doing one's duty" and more like pursuing one's deepest desires.
• POINT 3: Lack of joy (Note: Joy is one of the fruit of the Spirit: Galatians 5:22-23) in honoring the marriage commitment cannot be blamed on our spouses; the fault lies in our failure to depend on the goodness of God.

The basic cure for weak COMMITMENT is renewed faith (Spirit), not rededicated effort (Soul).

"Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the DESIRES of your heart." Psalm 37:4

In the video illustration, John Wayne plays the copilot of a DC-4 on a return trip from Hawaii. In a time of crisis, the young captain decides that the crippled jet can't make it to the West Coast and "decides" that they must ditch the jet in the ocean. With the flight engineer screaming that they are but minutes from landing, the captain insists that they must ditch. John Wayne heroically takes charge because of his great "desire" to make it to land. After putting the captain in his place, Wayne safely lands the jet in California. I used this scene to dramatically emphasize that when crisis hits the marriage, someone (husband or wife) needs to rise to the occasion, and with great "desire" refuse to make the decision to "ditch" the marriage. Enjoy the short video:

"The High And The Mighty"

The slides from today's lesson are below. Be sure to take time to look up the verses on God's goodness (see slide 35). Next week we will complete the teaching portion of The Marriage Builder with Building Block 3: ACCEPTANCE.